Each year, I link a blog post on Facebook and call Tourette Syndrome Awareness month a success. In my mind, I check it off the list. I spread some awareness, time for a break—a 364-day break, well earned, I need the rest. Last year I linked my thoughts on the book Motherless Brooklyn, Jonathan Lethem’s … Continue reading Aware
Introspection
Twenty Year Old Me from 1983
Sometimes I think of my phone as my best friend. Five years ago, I wrote an essay called Time Travel. I dismissed our current technological acuity as lightweight, more focused on entertaining ourselves with our cell phones than fixing the actual problems that plague society. Mostly, I focused on the severe diseases left unsolved from … Continue reading Twenty Year Old Me from 1983
Phone Call from the Future
Something's going on, and I'll probably never get it… --- Song lyric from She’s Crafty by the Beastie Boys I amaze myself at how incompetent I can be. If someone asked me what traits I hoped I instilled in my kids, my list would be 1) Politeness, 2) Empathy, and 3) Competence. That’s the order … Continue reading Phone Call from the Future
Hrurh
I don’t check my pulse; I don’t check my blood pressure. I sit with a tight chest, constricted lungs, rigid, like they might crack if I breathe too deeply. I woke today with a headache. I went to bed last night with the same headache. I made no progress over night. I worried when I … Continue reading Hrurh
Twilight Zone
Diane died yesterday. Diane is my stepmother, was. Or maybe ‘my father’s wife’ is a better description. They dated and then married while I was in my thirties, long after I needed mothering. Sort of—an adult, obviously, but still immature. At the family dinner the night before their wedding, I toasted my wicked stepmother, … Continue reading Twilight Zone
Anger is an Energy
Content warning: Old, obscure rock lyrics. They put a hot wire to my head'Cos of the things I did and saidAnd made these feelings go awayModel citizen in every way Anger is an energy!Anger is an energy!Anger is an energy!Anger is an energy! —excerpts from Rise by Public Image Ltd I drove to York … Continue reading Anger is an Energy
Antisocial Distance
I find myself backing up, stepping away. I want to say too close or give me some space. I want to grab a mask. The mask mandate at work lifted when the CDC told us to relax a few weeks ago. The pandemic ended, at least for the vaxxed. That first week, nothing changed for … Continue reading Antisocial Distance
Reentry into the World
Morning: My brain says get out and run. My body doesn’t move. The temperature dropped—forty-nine and windy, overcast, damp, gray. A step backwards, as if winter isn’t quite done with us, wearing us down, reeling us in. I prefer yesterday—sunny, breezy, seventy. A perfect day, but I didn’t run. I went to the YWCA spin-a-thon … Continue reading Reentry into the World
What’s a Bit?
-- 2016 -- Aliens invented time. I’m not talking about the passage of time: the counting of days and years, of aging and decay. What aliens invented is the way we humans “tell” time. The generic concept of time seems to be attributed to God, even though the Bible makes no reference to the day … Continue reading What’s a Bit?
A New Day
It’s a million pounds of marble. It sits like a boulderor a bomb-sheltertwo blocks from the Square,which is what we call the town center even though it’s a circle.Past the comic book storeand the candy shopand the place that sellsexpensive shoes from Sweden,the century-old Federal Buildinglooms on the left shamingevery other property on the street. … Continue reading A New Day
Mosquitoes, Compost and Pizza
I jammed the pizza box into the garbage bag and tossed it in the garage. The biodegradable pizza box from tonight’s dinner is made of cardboard. I stuck it in a plastic bag. The recycling people won’t take it. The grease stains somehow disrupt the recycling process. The waste management company won’t take anything unbagged. … Continue reading Mosquitoes, Compost and Pizza
Puzzles
Horse puzzles, she loved them. Early on, she worked a twenty-four-piece wooden job by Mellissa & Doug. A country scene, brightly colored—a horse-drawn apple cart, a big red barn, bright green trees and a yellow hay bale. A Clydesdale effortlessly pulls the cart to market. She dumped the puzzle on the carpet and stirred the … Continue reading Puzzles
¿ Dinner ?
I’m traveling up the coast. I found a pizza place online and ordered my dinner over the phone: Me: I'd like to order a Stromboli roll. Guy: Just One? Me: Oh, I don't know, how big are they? Are they much food? Guy: Well, how many do you want. Me: I don't know, is one … Continue reading ¿ Dinner ?
Kill the First Line
Y’all don’t write enough blog posts. Around the start of the pandemic, my attention span shortened. A causal relationship? Probably. I felt compelled to check the Johns Hopkins covid map every twenty minutes. And then the news, looking for the next appalling thing President Trump said or did. He rarely disappointed. The covid numbers crept … Continue reading Kill the First Line
My Tell
I’m an open book. Those in the know, Susan, my kids when they pay attention, possibly some coworkers, know my mood, my primal feelings just by watching and listening. Sitting on the couch this morning, talking to Susan, I started chewing on my pinky. Not at the end, my fingertip, like my kids chew on … Continue reading My Tell
WTF, Neil?
Caution #1: This post contains *salty* language. Caution #2: Old, privileged, white guy whining about his ridiculous first-world non-problem. Aargh!! Neil Young has pulled his music catalog off of Spotify. There are two types of people in this world. Those who could not possibly care less about this, and the rest of us—that’s 6,128,499 people … Continue reading WTF, Neil?
The Calm and the Storm
I have an annoying habit. Actually, I’ve got dozens of annoying habits, but I’m only writing about one of them. If someone says something that reminds me of a song lyric, I sing it. “Aw, that’s cute,” you say. No, it’s not, I’m as tone deaf as a stone. I can’t carry a tune. ♫ … Continue reading The Calm and the Storm
Mountain Top
Mountain Top, Pennsylvania, how many times have I driven through this town? When I met Susan, we frequently visited her parents in Sayre, Pennsylvania. Upon retirement, they opened a bed and breakfast in Milford, Pennsylvania. We took annual trips to visit Susan’s brother in Amherst, Massachusetts. Now we head to Vermont to take Sophie to … Continue reading Mountain Top
Write on Schedule
I never know what I’ll write until the typing starts. Often a vague topic floats through my head, a hazy arrow pointing the way, just a theme, but with no clear idea where I’m going. Other times, I form a strong opening sentence, that’s all, just a sentence—no subject, no area of focus. This always … Continue reading Write on Schedule
A Christmas Carol (part ii)
I read it every December. The library owns a ratty old copy, a broken binding, a lousy font. The lines sit too close together. People like me with a propensity towards double vision struggle not to jump around—reread the last line, skip to the next. Even though I know I’ll read it, since I always … Continue reading A Christmas Carol (part ii)
The Other Stuff 