Oblivious. Or maybe an open ear, monitoring the room. Yes, probably that, so just an impression of oblivion. I don’t stop myself; I bury my nose in the junction of her neck and shoulder, dry and downy, and inhale the sweet perfume of clean. One eye opens, staring, not at me, but across the room, … Continue reading Unwelcome Attention
Introspection
Walking a Wobbly Rope
David Sedaris called me an amateur. OK, let’s discuss the obvious: David Sedaris doesn’t know me; Although I have earned money writing, I’d hardly call myself a professional; Really, he only called one of my writing habits ‘amateur.’ Not me personally. Still, it hurt. Who’s David Sedaris? You’re kidding, right? In this gigantic WordPress world … Continue reading Walking a Wobbly Rope
Finding the Multiverse
Let’s start with a definition: The multiverse is an infinite realm of being or potential being of which the universe is regarded as a part or instance. Ha ha, just kidding. That’s actually the definition Google gave me, but it does me no good; I don’t understand it. Let’s try Merriam-Webster: a theoretical reality that … Continue reading Finding the Multiverse
300
How many blog posts is a lot? L. Stevens over at Everyday Strange does a daily quote. And poems, and a weekly calendar, and micro-fiction. I’ve been following her for years. She must have over a thousand posts. Same with Jo Hawk the Writer, she sometimes posts three times a day, how many times has … Continue reading 300
Blockade
The ramshackle jumble of tumble-down trees builds a blockade at the edge of my yard. Brown, mostly brown with highlights of muted green—ivy smothered trees, frozen, dried, projecting brown as well. So brownish on brown, in fading light it’s hard to focus on any one object. Fifteen years ago, my house freshly purchased, no deadfall, … Continue reading Blockade
Naked
“I was on your website this morning; I don’t get it.” This was my dad. I saw him yesterday for my extended family Christmas celebration. This post isn’t about family relationships, but of course it could be. We all have so much fertile ground to till on that topic. But then I wouldn’t be writing … Continue reading Naked
The Call
The call came late. Later than usual anyway. Historically the phone rings at 5:30 a.m. on the dot. Today was 5:56. This new administration is sloppy. And seriously, a two-hour delay? There’s a quarter inch of snow on the street. “You don’t know what it’s like in the mountains, Dad. It might be really dangerous.” … Continue reading The Call
And when the curtain rises
We huddle in the corner, avoiding the crowd, the noise. We picked Susan up at the train station. Me, getting my bearings, looking ahead to where I might pull in, I ran a red light. A chorus of horns drove me back to the line. Sitting stupid, trying to look proud, or at least competent … Continue reading And when the curtain rises
The Best on WordPress
I bailed on two more books last week. Something’s up. Either I’ve already read all the good books my library has to offer, or I’ve become too picky. I can’t find anything to read. I work in that library. Not as a librarian, but as a finance manager. I do the accounting, the budgeting, I … Continue reading The Best on WordPress
Post-Thanksgiving, Hungover
I just wrote a piece called Depression in Two Parts. I stuck it in the Vault. That’s what I call the buried folder on my hard drive where revealing essays go to die. The ones I don’t want to post. The ones that aren’t about me. DITP is about family. And friends (ex-friends) and emotions. … Continue reading Post-Thanksgiving, Hungover
Winning
It’s an ugly day. Dark gray, drab. You could say it’s raining on my parade, but it isn’t. Not yet, but it will. On a whim, I took today off work. The car needed to go in for service—oil leak—something to be stressed about. I took it in for an oil leak three weeks ago, … Continue reading Winning
Before & After
Before Are people laughing at my antique laptop? Months ago, as my laptop sat thinking, cursor spinning, trying to open Google Chrome, I finally admitted I needed to buy a new one. I timed it. It took a full minute to wake up the screen and open a browser window. I started pricing laptops. We … Continue reading Before & After
A Eulogy for Me
As a blogger, it’s my job to write about my emotions. Strike that, blogging isn’t a job, I don’t get paid… anything. It’s my responsibility, an expectation that I tell you how I feel. What would be the point of a blog of introspection if it didn’t capture the rawness, agitation and truth that accompanies … Continue reading A Eulogy for Me
Killing time at Hyundai
Part of my 'killing time' collection. Be advised, I'm not suggesting it's time to kill. Gritty(er), (more) industrial. My morning run around Hanover, PA, not on foot, but on wheels. My car, the Hyundai, the ‘good’ one, needs service. It burns oil, consumes oil, a mechanic recently said. I brought it to the Honda dealership … Continue reading Killing time at Hyundai
I love you, what’s your name
I love you, I love you, I love you What's your name? I love you, I love you, I love you What's your name? Chorus of “Drunken Butterfly” by Sonic Youth. Do you blog? I’m guessing you do. I read a study showing that ninety-two percent of blog readers are also blog writers.* As a … Continue reading I love you, what’s your name
Expiration Date
I’m going to live forever. I’ve written that before. Five years ago when I was a shiny new blogger, fit, coasting in an easy job, spending at least eight hour per week writing, immortality looked like a good idea. My kids were younger, less complicated; my relationships were better, I still had friends. I couldn’t … Continue reading Expiration Date
Wise Speech
My wife Susan does this thing (or really should I say she doesn’t do it). She doesn’t gossip. She doesn’t suppose, she doesn’t rumor, she doesn’t compare. She only talks about others when it’s necessary to talk about others. When this first started, maybe twelve years ago, it was disconcerting. Suddenly we weren’t talking to … Continue reading Wise Speech
God’s Light
Maine, It’s not just vacation-land, it’s an acid trip. That’s the caption I wanted to write on Taylor’s Facebook page when she posted this crazy photo. Around the time she snapped this picture (using her iPhone 6, not the high-end digital SLR camera she always seems to have strapped around her neck), I experienced similar … Continue reading God’s Light
What I sent
Yesterday, I applied for a grant. I think bloggers should get paid… something. It’s a hobby, yes, but it’s also a job. People rely on us for reading material. A few of the bloggers I follow have set up Patreon accounts. This is a blog-specific eCommerce interface, they call it croudfunding, where followers can make … Continue reading What I sent
Dilemma
Humid as a swamp, the temperature rising, like a steam room coming to life. Yesterday was similar, hard to breathe, the edge of hot, but that was mid-afternoon in the heat of the day. This morning, we’re just getting started. “Can we turn off the AC for a few days? I’d rather be hot than … Continue reading Dilemma
