A skinny envelope sat on our kitchen table. Susan pulled it from the mailbox at 5:00—minutes after Sophie left for practice. She picked it up, held it, searching for any vibes it might send. “It’s so thin, it can’t be good news.” “You’re basing that on thirty-year-old information,” I said. “We don’t know how things … Continue reading Searching for Acceptance
Parenting
Quarantine
Crap. Now I have it too. For five weeks, I’ve obsessed over the coronavirus. With my browser open to CNN’s COVID-19 Live Updates, every time they posted any new tidbit of information, I got an alert. I watched the charts and stats and calculated death rates, growth rates and recovery rates. I watched a slow-motion … Continue reading Quarantine
And Again
Back when we still paid for cable, I sat, mid-morning on my carpeted floor, back against the couch, a sandwich and chips by my side, and watched hurricane coverage. As the hurricane made landfall, I couldn’t pull myself away from the Weather Channel. I waited and waited for something, anything to happen. Never mind that … Continue reading And Again
Outside my Comfort Zone
Just like that, I’m a spin instructor again. Do you know about spin? It’s an exercise class. Stationary bikes semi-circled around a leader (that’s me). I select the music, choreograph the workout, think of motivating things to say. The part I like most about spin is that anyone—at any fitness level—can participate. A seventy-five-year-old can … Continue reading Outside my Comfort Zone
Crunch Time
The clock ticks, inches forward. Fits and starts. I’m on call now, unenergetic and a little grumpy. Four hours 'till midnight. Sophie picks up the piece of paper next to her on the couch. She reads aloud in a sing-song voice. In French. “Sophie! No homework now. I’m waiting.” Fingers paused over her keyboard, not … Continue reading Crunch Time
Cutting the Strings
Sophie drove the rental car. I don’t think it’s allowed. I told the agent we have three drivers; he didn’t mention any restrictions. He never asked her age, so I never told. Still, I doubt they want a seventeen-year-old driving their car. She leaves at 5:30, Tuesdays and Thursdays. “Text us when you get there, … Continue reading Cutting the Strings
300
How many blog posts is a lot? L. Stevens over at Everyday Strange does a daily quote. And poems, and a weekly calendar, and micro-fiction. I’ve been following her for years. She must have over a thousand posts. Same with Jo Hawk the Writer, she sometimes posts three times a day, how many times has … Continue reading 300
A Safe Ending
Sophie stayed out past curfew. Not the curfew Susan and I set—we didn’t set one—but the curfew set by the state of Pennsylvania: seventeen-year-old drivers are banned from the road by eleven. Sophie’s never had a parental curfew; she’s never stayed out unreasonably late, and she’s never done anything to make us doubt her judgement. … Continue reading A Safe Ending
MACH3 Turbo
How long does a razor blade last? Google this, but it’s hard to come up with an answer. First, I got dumped into a bunch of Reddit forums about a gaming computer called Razer Blade. It seems Razer Blades have a reputation for frequent breakdowns. After five minutes of reading about Razer Blade’s short shelf … Continue reading MACH3 Turbo
Happy Tourette Christmas
Hey! Chingedy ching, hee-haw, hee-haw It's Dominick the donkey. Chingedy ching, hee-haw, hee-haw The Italian Christmas donkey. Tourette Syndrome (TS) is a weird disorder. It makes you do things you don’t want to do. Yes, we’re all aware of the stereotyped guy who f-bombs in church, but he’s a pretty slim minority. Most of us … Continue reading Happy Tourette Christmas
The Call
The call came late. Later than usual anyway. Historically the phone rings at 5:30 a.m. on the dot. Today was 5:56. This new administration is sloppy. And seriously, a two-hour delay? There’s a quarter inch of snow on the street. “You don’t know what it’s like in the mountains, Dad. It might be really dangerous.” … Continue reading The Call
And when the curtain rises
We huddle in the corner, avoiding the crowd, the noise. We picked Susan up at the train station. Me, getting my bearings, looking ahead to where I might pull in, I ran a red light. A chorus of horns drove me back to the line. Sitting stupid, trying to look proud, or at least competent … Continue reading And when the curtain rises
The Christmas Tree, 2019
Another year, another Christmas post. For a non-Christian, I spend a lot of time each December writing about Christmas. We picked up our tree today. For the fourth year in a row, we drove out through the dormant apple orchards to Showers’ Tree Farm. We used to go to Seven Springs Tree Farm, closer to … Continue reading The Christmas Tree, 2019
Post-Thanksgiving, Hungover
I just wrote a piece called Depression in Two Parts. I stuck it in the Vault. That’s what I call the buried folder on my hard drive where revealing essays go to die. The ones I don’t want to post. The ones that aren’t about me. DITP is about family. And friends (ex-friends) and emotions. … Continue reading Post-Thanksgiving, Hungover
CJ’s Resolution Challenge
Now I’ve done it. I’ve signed up for a race—CJ’s Resolution Challenge. It supports mid-Pennsylvania autism related organizations. “How long is the race?” you might ask. Well, that depends on how fast I run. On January 4, I’m doing a timed run. For three hours, I’ll run laps around a 1.6 mile wooded loop in … Continue reading CJ’s Resolution Challenge
Life is Good
A Facebook private message to me: It’s Eric’s birthday. We’re going to Appalachian Brewing Company after spin. This was waiting yesterday morning when I woke up. I messaged Lisa the night before looking for Eric’s cell number. As one of my first actions as a mountain bike coach, I’m setting up a spin class as … Continue reading Life is Good
Fancy Feast®
I pop open the can, Roz rubs against my leg. She paces back and forth, eager, and lets out a “mrouw.” “Mmm, Roz, it’s Salmon Feast in Gravy, your favorite.” It’s mine, too. I smell it and think how good it would taste over crackers—Carr’s® Table Water crackers to be specific. Two summers ago, my … Continue reading Fancy Feast®
Christmas Creep
Rockin' around the Christmas tree At the Christmas party hop Mistletoe hung where you can see Every couple tries to stop “Who doesn’t like Christmas music?” Eli asked me this on our donut run this morning. His friend John slept over, and they needed a breakfast of fat and sugar to start their day correctly. … Continue reading Christmas Creep
Providence
Do your ever wonder “So what happened next?” I would. My blog is full of cliff-hangers. I write pondering posts questioning whether I should take some action in my life. Some are written just as I take on a new and positive activity. At the crest of a life-change. And then I never mention it … Continue reading Providence
So many reasons to say yes
We arrived before the party even started. It didn’t make sense. Why show up early when I wanted to spend as little time there as possible? I guess we did it for Eli. Saturday was his season-end shindig. A cookout, a camp out, a chance to hang out with his coaches and teammates and not … Continue reading So many reasons to say yes
