Thank God it was glass; at least I could see what was going on. Every time the elevator stopped at a floor, it would get close, within a few inches of level with the exit, and then make a series of micro-adjustments trying to get itself just right. Every trip took an extra thirty seconds … Continue reading Vacation Highlight #1
Author: Jeff Cann
Live each day without judgement
I’m goal oriented—meaning I aim towards setting goals. And then I nail them. Find the right medication for Tourettes, run a 50K, score a new job; these are a few from the past year, all complete. The year before that had a few as well: publish a book and quit drinking are a couple of … Continue reading Live each day without judgement
Sweet and Naughty
“Maybe we could put a swing in our sunroom.” Yes, a swing. Two heavy ropes bolted to the ceiling supporting a plank of wood. My family now wants a swing as a novelty seat somewhere in our house. Each day we take a lunchtime break from the sun. It’s needed. Every beach session ends on … Continue reading Sweet and Naughty
Follow
When I hit follow, I mean it. Many WordPress users follow blogs simply to get a follow back. To boost their numbers. I understand this. Because it happens to me so infrequently, getting a follower is like a small hit of crack. A rush. Topping a milestone, 100, 200, etc, is something more. But I … Continue reading Follow
A new me
The drinker who doesn’t drink. That’s me. I quit eighteen months ago. No backsliding, no cheating. Once I got through the first few months, it hasn’t really been that bad. I have Tourettes Syndrome. But you’d never know it. My tics are fully in control. Effectively medicated with no obvious side-effects. As an added bonus, … Continue reading A new me
Paradise
Like a campy hallucination scene from a cautionary drug-addiction movie, pin-head sized white spiders skitter across my laptop keyboard and screen. But these are real (I think). As genuine as the warm, wafting breezes crossing the main living space of our rental house. And the mosquitoes so engorged they sit on the floor, unable to … Continue reading Paradise
Careful what you wish for
I just went beyond two weeks without posting anything new. What have I been up to? ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Bored. That’s the only accurate description. I go to work and then wait for something to happen. I wait for some problem—preferably a crisis—that requires my attention. But it doesn’t happen. Everyone is … Continue reading Careful what you wish for
The Gift Card
I’ll be honest. I was after the gift card. Fifty dollars, Amazon.com—that’s a lot of music. I teach a spin class each week. That’s an exercise class on stationary bicycles. The music is an important part of the experience. And I’ve been wanting to upgrade my music library for months now. But my pay for … Continue reading The Gift Card
Flashback Friday: That’s a thing, right?
I was thinking about racial justice the other day. That's not weird, I work for a non-profit whose mission includes eliminating racism. I started thinking about Radicalized Patriots, an essay I published when my blog was new. I thought it was pretty good, but only a handful of people ever read it. It's still timely with … Continue reading Flashback Friday: That’s a thing, right?
Fused
A car pulls onto the road behind us. I try to look back, but I can’t. It’s too much effort. I really want to see, so I turn my body completely around. The world passes my slowly turning eyes. My neck is fused, ears above my shoulders. I spin as a unit. As a metal … Continue reading Fused
The Lottery
When I get ticked-off at life, I play the lottery. When I’m frustrated by my earnings, by my job, by my writing, by my health, the lottery distracts me. The lottery gives me hope. I drop a buck. Always on the quick-pick. I have no premonitions. I’d be embarrassed to presume a hunch. I’m vaguely … Continue reading The Lottery
Time Travel
I read a news article this morning about time travelers. Well, I read it on the internet, and it was while I was reading the news, so I’m going to call it a news article. In truth, it was just a series photos—heavily overlaid with advertisements--showing old-timey, black and white photos from the twenties into … Continue reading Time Travel
Whitey and the Riff Raff
In 1983, my college dorm room was an important meeting place. Monday through Friday at 3:00, my roommate and four or five of our friends would gather to watch General Hospital. I write this in a way that implies zero involvement from me. But that’s only partially true. I rarely settled in to watch GH, but … Continue reading Whitey and the Riff Raff
Artichokes
Betty Botter bought some butter; But she said "this butter’s bitter! "If I put it in my batter It would make my batter bitter. So she bought a bit of butter Better than the bitter butter. And she put it in the batter, But it made her batter worse. Last night was Butter-Night. Dinner, nothing but … Continue reading Artichokes
“Hey, I should warn you, Charlene has googly eyes.” “What does that mean?” They pop way out, like on a frog… or a bug.” “Um, thanks for the warning.” At the start of my career, I worked for a Fortune 500 defense contractor called TRW. One company, 30,000 employees. In an effort to maintain a … Continue reading Google
Summer (flash non-fiction)
When I finish my run, I settle in on my back porch. Glass of water at my side. Not tap water, seltzer water made in a handy machine purchased at Walmart. I always include a wedge of lime. It makes my drink seem somehow better, even though I can't really taste the lime. A bag … Continue reading Summer (flash non-fiction)
The Blue Trail
A longish short story that I classify as Almost Fiction. A fairly dramatic departure from my usual writing. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Shovel in hand, part-way through the job of replacing my sump-pump drainage pipe, I first caught sight of Pat. I was still digging out the decayed tar-paper piping that was … Continue reading The Blue Trail
Stepped Outside the World
Caution, old dude writing. Some of my references are older than my readers. I’ve included links to Wikipedia so you can figure out what the hell I’m talking about. ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ I’m not sure when it started. Five months ago? Five years? And I’m not sure when it was complete. But by … Continue reading Stepped Outside the World
Apple Cider Donut Cake
No, this isn’t a recipe. As I think about it, I suppose there’s some apple cider, some flour, probably some sort of lard… Not a recipe, just some thoughts. Apple cider donut cake was the most recent treat to grace our kitchen counter. Susan, on her maternal side, is a first generation American. Her Ukrainian … Continue reading Apple Cider Donut Cake
Porch
Stuff. I don’t really have much. I rarely buy things. I’m thrifty, cheap. And I obsess. It’s too stressful to buy something new. New stuff needs to be perfect. I’d rather use an old, broken one than risk disappointment from the new one. My hobbies: Running and writing. So yes, I have a laptop and … Continue reading Porch
