Gone are the days when I wake up an hour early to write. Long gone. This morning I was up at 5:15. That early alarm setting allows forty-five minutes of quiet self-care—coffee, news, cereal—before my kids grudgingly get out of bed. They require constant and sometimes not-so-gentle nudging towards door to start their school day. … Continue reading Censored by Decency
Wordpress
Six Word Story – Part II
Sometimes, I fall flat on my face. That’s seven words, this isn’t a six word story, it’s an essay about my most recent post, Six Word Story . As bloggers, I suppose we all do this from time to time. We post something truly special (to ourselves), our A-work, and no one sees the brilliance. … Continue reading Six Word Story – Part II
Bloggers: What is your best post?
There’s a guy who reads my blog every day. He reads my new posts over and over again. He rereads last month’s posts on a regular basis. And he reads through the old stuff, the stuff I wrote years ago, even when no one else does. That guy is me. I like what I write, … Continue reading Bloggers: What is your best post?
World Blogger
Greenland! Bah! My biggest failure. Does anyone even live there? This is a map of my blogging world. If the country is colored, someone in that country has read my blog. Or at least they’ve landed on my blog. How many actually read it? I need better analytics to answer that question. Last week, I … Continue reading World Blogger
Etymology, Idioms & Blogs
Hit the ground running… have I done this? Not really. Consider this idiom: A parachuting reference? Jumping off a train? Out of a car? I googled the etymology and found “It may come from troops dropped into a combat zone, from stowaways.” Ignoring the weird punctuation, I tried to find out what a ‘stowaway’ is. … Continue reading Etymology, Idioms & Blogs
Everyday Strange
Of the seventy-nine million blogs on the WordPress platform, Everyday Strange is one of my favorites—and yes, I've read them all. Most blogs, like mine, require a time investment. Five or ten or fifteen minutes of reading through heavily preened prose trying to decipher the point, if there is one at all. Conversely, the posts on … Continue reading Everyday Strange
Out and about
Today I'm honored to be invited as a guest-blogger on ScottRCyre.com. Scott is an author, a freelance copywriter, and a Christian Pastor. He and I have been friends on WordPress for a couple of years now. Check out my post, An Itch I Gotta Scratch, and check out Scott's blog. -- Jeff
Buzz, revisited
Last week, I posted a story, Buzz, that paints a picture of drug use. It wasn’t encouraging or cautionary. It offered no opinion. It was simply a snapshot, a vivid scene featuring four intoxicated teens. It went nowhere. Stats-wise, it was my worst performing story in a year. Thirty page-views, two commenters, not so many likes. … Continue reading Buzz, revisited
The Other Stuff
#3 - List all aliases: I was asked about aliases recently as I filled out paperwork for my FBI background check. In Pennsylvania, if you plan to work with children, you need to prove—up-front—that you don’t have a propensity to molest them. To facilitate this, your employer needs to review your “Rap Sheet.” The first … Continue reading The Other Stuff
Killing time on New Year’s Eve
I am killing time by blogging, I'm not saying that it's time to kill. Sometimes what I write is crap. This time, I’m blaming Eli. If you don’t frequently read my blog, you won’t know that Eli is my son. He’s twelve. His favorite activities are computer use and destroying shit—usually by fire—but always under … Continue reading Killing time on New Year’s Eve
Ben Huberman
I’m pathetic. No, really, I am. I’m checking my Gmail account twenty-five, thirty times a day. Each time, as I click the link, I repeat my silent mantra. Ben Huberman. Who’s Ben? He’s an editor at WordPress. The guy who sent me an email last July telling me that my blogpost Follow was about to … Continue reading Ben Huberman
Do Not Reply (Satire)
Jeff Cann <donotreply@wordpress.com> Time: December 16, 2017 at 2:26 pm IP Address: 77.175.23.87 Contact Form URL: https://jefftcann.com/contact/ Sent by a verified WordPress.com user. Name: Melissa Marks Email: melissa.marks72@yahoo.com Website: http://lifeisstrangeblog.com Comment: Hi Jeff, I’ve been reading your blog for nine months now, and I have to say, receiving your posts are the highlight of my week. I feel … Continue reading Do Not Reply (Satire)
Facebook my Wordpress
I can’t think of single thing to write. This has been going on all week. I sat down the morning after the Alabama Senate election, and I couldn’t get started. I wrote a halfhearted paragraph, and then I packed it in. The rest of the week’s been a blank page. There are things I want … Continue reading Facebook my WordPress
Renewal
Every so often, I’ll read a post that’s eerily similar to one I recently published. Too similar. They clearly—I think—stole the idea from me. And I say “Heeeyy, uncool. At least give me a shout-out!” I’m stepping into that realm today, and I don’t want to be accused of plagiarism, idea theft, unoriginality. Yesterday morning, … Continue reading Renewal
The cost of blogging
Acer 14" Chromebook, 32GB Flash Memory: $299.00 WordPress Premium upgrade with custom URL: $99.00 100 Vistaprint business cards to publicize book and blog: $16.00 One comment informing me that a post I wrote helped a reader gain understanding and relief from their own personal problems: Priceless via Daily Prompt: Priceless
Gratitude
“Don’t let your attitude affect your gratitude!” That’s me talking. “Dad! Shut up! You sound like a stupid kids’ TV show.” This is Eli, he’s eleven. Is he allowed to tell me to shut up? I guess so—when I’m being obnoxious. I’ve been saying the attitude/gratitude thing over and over. I say it like this: … Continue reading Gratitude
Great Expectations
Yes, I know that title’s already been used. ~ ~ ~ ~ “Hundreds of new followers? Isn’t that a good thing?” This was my daughter Sophie. I just told her about having my post featured in WordPress’s Discover. This happened on Sunday morning at 9:00. Seven hours later, Sophie was just getting home. She slept … Continue reading Great Expectations
Follow
When I hit follow, I mean it. Many WordPress users follow blogs simply to get a follow back. To boost their numbers. I understand this. Because it happens to me so infrequently, getting a follower is like a small hit of crack. A rush. Topping a milestone, 100, 200, etc, is something more. But I … Continue reading Follow
Below the Surface
Hey Jeff, I didn’t realize there was an exclusivity of using the tag “tourettes”. This is news to me. I won’t be taking up your kind offer to read your post. But thanks! I’ve had only one snarky encounter in WordPress. It was a fight that I picked. That was the response. Like many WordPress … Continue reading Below the Surface
Red Light
Before Instagram. Before Snapchat. Before Oovoo, Twitter, Pinterest, Facebook, MySpace or email, there was the telephone. In 1986, twenty-three years old, I took a business trip. Two weeks in Denver for training on a workplace population tracking program. I worked for the mega-firm TRW. A government contractor with tens of thousands of employees. So many … Continue reading Red Light
