On Saturday, the first day of what, until a week ago, was called Black History Month, my wife, daughter and I visited the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Yes, you know this place, its grand entrance is reached by the Rocky stairs—the staircase that Sylvester Stallone famously sprints at the end of his street-training montage in the Academy Award winning film, Rocky. *
Despite the two-and-a-half-hour drive, we didn’t go there to see a specific exhibit. My father-in-law planned to spend the day with his granddaughter at a Villanova basketball game so we drove him. The museum seemed like a great way to kill a few hours.
People like me who spend their entire lives in the Washington, DC area learn an obnoxious bias. We expect our art museums to be free to use like the taxpayer supported Smithsonian Institution we grew up with. The Smithsonian hasn’t yet, but certainly will, attract the cost-cutting attention of the Musk/Trump slash and burn committee. The Smithsonian will either start charging admissions like the thirty-dollar-apiece fee at the Philadelphia Museum of Art or shut down completely. I suspect shut down, because do you have any idea what all that prime real estate lining the National Mall must be worth?
We lucked out. The feature exhibit in Philadelphia was The Time Is Always Now: Artists Reframe the Black Figure—a phenomenal collection of paintings, sculptures and multimedia pieces created by twenty-eight contemporary Black artists. The exhibition was broken into three sections, the first being “Double Consciousness,” a reference to W.E.B. Dubois’s late 19th-century social research around the lived experiences of Black people in Philadelphia as a psychological double identity. This phenomenon concerns the tension manifesting in one’s autonomous selfhood with the alienating effects of the ever-present “white gaze.” **
The gallery showed painting after painting exploring dual self-images: those as seen by the painter and/or painting subject, and those as imagined from others (White people) looking in from outside.
Reading Dubois’s description and seeing these paintings unexpectedly hit a nerve for me—a White man in his sixties. I tried to view these paintings from a Black perspective, the artist’s perspective, and see the intended duality. The artist’s self-view of a complex, well-rounded figure: strong and fragile, perfect and flawed, fierce and frightened, intelligent and ignorant, combined with the two-dimensional White gaze layered into the artwork—sometimes depicting negative stereotypes.
Because I’m the most self-centered person alive, the exhibition made me think about how the White gaze lands on me, and how that compares with my own internal self-perception. My boss, new to the area last year, tells me she constantly hears positive things about me in my overwhelmingly White, rural community. “Everyone loves Jeff,” that’s what she always says.
This is at odds with what I think of myself. When I paint myself, with words instead of images, I depict a guy eight-years sober embarrassed by his past; a guy who twitches and grunts the tics of Tourette; a guy anxious he doesn’t meet the standards others set for him. My self-portrait is jagged and broken, the canvass torn.
I don’t see the competent, friendly, intelligent guy making the transition from middle-age into senior-hood. Like the artists in the exhibition, I see a complex individual with a depth belied by my stereotyped shell. Dubois’s Double Consciousness cuts both ways. For me it offers camouflage, for those artists, contrast.
The timing of the exhibit couldn’t be better. For the past two weeks, I’ve obsessed over the direction of race relations in the United States. As Trump and his cronies whitewash America, I can only imagine the White gaze becoming more critical, more distrusting. For me this seems a giant step backwards in time, a regression into a less enlightened era. Yet, the artists from the exhibit might tell me it’s just more of the same.
* Yes, of course we ran the Rocky stairs. The three of us even danced around at the top with our fists in the air. Not the hardest stairs I’ve run, but certainly the most public.
** Blurb of The Time Is Always Now: Artists Reframe the Black Figure from the Philadelphia Museum of Art website.
Header image: Untitled (Painter) by Kerry James Marshall (photographed by author)
The Other Stuff 
That is an interesting theme for an exhibition. I like your reflection.
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I have been contemplating Black History Month and how I would like to honor it. Last year, I chose 28 Americans who grew up black in the United States (<– purpose for this phrasing.) to highlight their contributions to society and events. Our experiences here are different yet very much the same. I fear everyone who is not a minority will soon know that struggle with DEI roll backs as it will affect friends, loved ones, co workers, and neighbors. Anyway… I did this and quickly realized that some of my white friends didn't appreciate it, didn't care, or didn't understand my wanting to do this.
The comment I got most was, "If this really happened in America, why didn't I learn about it in school growing up." The reply I gave… "History books are the equivalent of Bibles in the classroom. You're taught to respect it's contents and not to question the authority of the author." Well of course that was taken the wrong way by a few people. I let them argue by themselves in the comments. I didn't want to engage, but I pressed on. After the announcement of several "friends" that they were opting out of friendship, I continued with my posts.
I think this year, I'm going to relax. I'm not militant by any means. But expending energy to try to teach people burnt me out. Watching arguments happen also didn't help. Rather than be consumed by negative discourse, I think I'll just relax and find something positive.
Seeing this post, maybe if I do post something for the month… it'll be black artists and their contributions. Sorry to take up so much space. I'm glad you posted this today. Thank you!
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Yes, please take some time to post about Black artists this month. This Orwellian stripping of information that is going on right now is scaring the crap out of me. The past two weeks has been pulled straight from a sci-fi novel. I honestly think dissenting voices will be silenced before long. Say what needs to be said now. Hyperbolic? I hope so, but the pace of change is head spinning. Be a good human. 🙂
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“It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced.”
~
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I wonder what he’d say about us right now in the state we’re in. Revolutions are born of oppression and inequality, I guess we’ll see what happens.
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I think many (all?) of our long dead leaders would be disgusted with the current state of things just as are our still living ex-leaders. One funny thing to point out is that Trump likes to compare himself to Lincoln, who is known for the most eloquent speech in our country’s history, whereas the only modifier Trump seems to know is very, very, very.
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Sigh. Embarrassingly, I needed to look that quote up. Not a very good gettysburg resident. Especially after helping both my kids memorize the address as is required in grade school here.
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Not to take anything away from DuBois, but I’ve always thought that we all have double consciousness. I like the way you point out how it may work to the advantage of some (ie, white) people. Some people have attributes added by the external gaze, some have them dismissed.
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Right, the double consciousness idea seems to be pretty wide spread. Susan follows a Buddhist teacher who describes this as “the space suit self.” We discussed this a little during the exhibit.
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It sounds like a fascinating exhibit, Jeff, and I can relate as a gay man living in a straight world.
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I think all of us who feel ‘othered’ in any way would make a similar connection. Although my ability to hide behind my skin color takes off a lot of pressure. The exhibit is about to (next week) move on to somewhere else. I wish my post could drive more people to see it.
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Who can say but he probably would not be surprised to see liberal democracy under serious threat.
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oh dear god. I could have written this about myself. Bravo.
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I wrote my previous comment on the bus because I loved this piece so much I needed to yell it out. I love reading the comments now. The parallel universe. Paradoxes. The Buddhist. Kerry James Marshall is from Chicago . He is a gentle, kind and humble man. His words are soft and poetic. But his paintings are big and noisy and colorful and scream at us. Double consciousness. Love you Jeff. Thanks.
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I’m so excited this piece hit home for you. Chicago seems like a natural future stop for the exhibit. If it arrives, don’t hesitate to go. It’s interesting how many of us wordpress writers identify with isms and bias. We’re definitely an introspective lot. I wish the blogging community wasn’t shrinking so dramatically.
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I certainly hope that the Musk/Trump presidency keeps its hands off of the Smithsonian museums! And for better or worse, I also see myself much different than people see me. Maybe it is because I know what is under the surface while others can only see the surface?
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Well, of course the Smithsonian is a sacred institution, and there’s no way they would touch one of those, right? RIGHT? I think the double consciousness thing is pretty universal. I don’t want to diminish what the exhibit showed, because I think Black Americans have felt the negative impact of this since the start of… what? Time? But it probably affects most of us, just many in a positive way instead of a negative way.
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Reading this again today at coffee before church wondering why i’m even going since the world is coming to an end and this reflection is so much truer clearer cleaner than anything I get at church.
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Thanks Regan, I needed a vote of confidence like this today. So tempting to just crawl into bed and hide from the world. I think we mostly need to reboot our expectations of the world we live in. Yes, fight, but also know that things will be different for a long time. Spring is coming.
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