In the darkest nights of winter, Susan and I jog deserted streets. Channeling Jackson Pollock, our swinging hands gripping flashlights scribble vanishing art across the pavement. In the blackness, there’s nothing to see save two beams as they dance and bounce first behind and then before us. We don’t talk. The patterns in our foot-falls and quiet labored breath accompany familiar melodies in my head.
I’m not much for meditation. A woman with a script guides my thoughts:
“Imagine a warm room, leather sofa, a crackling fire…”
“Soften first your neck muscles…”
“Envision a vast ocean…”
Breathe in, breathe out. I wander. Enumerate the things I didn’t do, the things that still need doing. Plan my night, problem solve, I’m wasting time. Susan meditates daily. Fifteen minutes, twenty minutes, she centers herself and moves on with her day. Years ago, I went through a phase; twenty minutes of yoga then Shavasana—on my back, still. Listen for the birds and insects. Be the birds and insects. Unsustainable, at least for me. I let it go.
We run. Twenty-five minutes without distraction. A porch light up the street, a barking dog behind glass, traffic on a distant road, breath, feet. Crazy, lights slashing in and out of vision. I focus, but I don’t. I find peace.
Original photo by Jeremy Perkins on Unsplash
The Other Stuff 
You two are cool people Jeff 😊
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Ha! I can’t imagine too less cool people. You should talk with my kids. They’ll set you straight 😉
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I’ve not ever successfully adopted a meditation practice. But it occurred to me long ago that I’m meditating when I’m running most mornings – just footfalls and breathing, no talking. Often my mind is swirling with thoughts and ideas, but other times, I’m simply aware of the sounds of nature, my breathing, and my footsteps (and those of my dogs), that’s it. And that’s enough to calm me.
I think your nighttime runs with flashlights sound hypnotic, in a good way. Meditative.
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We were really dreading winter because we thought we weren’t going to like running in the dark. I’m starting to miss it as we get more and more light in the evenings. Next week it’s all over. I thought I should write my ode before the time change.
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I love this! You paint a very cool picture. Peaceful.
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Thank you.
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There are more than one way to meditate. In my opinion, running is one. I have ADHD so sitting and trying to control my thoughts is not really my thing… But letting my mind wander during a long run seems to achieve the same thing. Your night runs sound very meditative and a little hypnotic too!
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Back when I was running mileage in the teens every Saturday, I was quite centered. These small shots, while brief do much the same thing.
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I have a friend that swears how beneficial meditating is, and times that I have tired to follow a guided meditation, my mind is still all over the place and so I have found little success. But when I run, I can find that centering peace if I take the effort to guide my thoughts to where I am, my breathing, what I am doing. Those runs do go better too!
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Susan tells me “if you’d just practice…” I’m sure she’s right. I just can’t do it. She’s come to realize that running is my way to get there and she’s very encouraging that I go.
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Sounds like moving meditation to me, which might be a great name for a blog! 😉
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Right, or “Meditation in motion.” I’ll take my royalty cut now, thank you.
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Beautiful.
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You meditate while you run. That sounds like fun. :))
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Well, I just run. But I wind up meditated.
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Meditation is just mindfulness of the moment you’re in. It took me a long time to realize that all the distractions weren’t me “failing” to meditate, but part of it. Anything you do can be meditation: running, writing, eating, sitting, etc., etc.
I like how this piece captures the “flow” while at the same time showing the struggle with feeling we’re not doing it properly.
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It’s really something I don’t ‘get’. With my wife I always said “You meditate, running is my thing.” Well now *she’s* running. Is it time I start to mindfully meditate?
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I would find pain in running but am glad you find peace.
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