The Conversation

Arrrr. This photo is unrelated to the story that follows... “I think I need to see Nicole.” “You’re feeling pretty bad, huh?” Who’s Nicole? She’s the only mental health professional I see. Tourette syndrome, obsessive compulsive disorder, general anxiety disorder, (rarely) depression, social anxiety. I should employ an army of neurologists, psychiatrists and therapists. Instead, … Continue reading The Conversation

Hrurh

I don’t check my pulse; I don’t check my blood pressure. I sit with a tight chest, constricted lungs, rigid, like they might crack if I breathe too deeply. I woke today with a headache. I went to bed last night with the same headache. I made no progress over night. I worried when I … Continue reading Hrurh

Routine

It’s a simple mechanism, the garage door lock. A spring-loaded bolt pushed through a slot in a metal rail—the rail the garage door rolls along as it’s opened or closed. It’s like a deadbolt on the front door. Binary, locked/unlocked, no gray area. A lever releases the lock. The bolt springs back, unlocking the door. … Continue reading Routine

News media recycle fears and concernsunfounded, unfolded, cautionary blurbsthat hold my attention, anxiety building,society willing to follow the story,wary of lies which fall where they may,the sun shines bright on a pretty fall day. Subscribe to get access Read more of this content when you subscribe today. Log in News cycle recycles fears and concernsunfounded, … Continue reading

Wilderness

  Is it an addiction? An escape? This morning started with promise. Overcast but warm. Eli and I planned to mountain bike after lunch. I drank my coffee and ate Golden Grahams. I kicked back on the couch to read the news with an espresso. About that espresso: Susan has harbored a love/hate relationship with … Continue reading Wilderness

Un-Disabled

Last night I watched Chicago Hope. It’s a medical drama, I think. This episode was about a hospital, and I assume they’re all about a hospital, so let’s go with calling it a medical drama. In this episode René Auberjonois, the actor who starred as Father Mulcahy on the TV show M*A*S*H, played a surgeon … Continue reading Un-Disabled

Back Burner

I’m finally starting to learn. This is an international blog, a global space. A place for diversity, multi-multiculturalism. I’m too American—United States, American. Therefore, I assume everyone is just like me. A few months ago, a blogger wrote about her hob. “Right,” I asked “What the hell is a hob?” It turns out in Ireland, … Continue reading Back Burner

Disease

Disease. I’ve been using this word frequently. Not out loud, but in my head. And always pertaining to myself. Disease: not meaning ill, tainted or disordered. But literally the opposite—the reverse of—ease. Pronounce it dis-ease. [Dis: a Latin prefix meaning “apart,” “asunder,” “away” or having a negative, or reversing force—used freely, especially with these latter … Continue reading Disease

R.E.M.

Stephen King is my favorite author. This is less of a declaration than a confession; he’s not that great a writer. His stories are usually long, unedited monsters that draw in unnecessary subplots, and drone on and on with overly expansive writing. As a master of imaginative stories, he expects no imagination from his readers. … Continue reading R.E.M.