Jeff Cann <donotreply@wordpress.com>
Time: December 16, 2017 at 2:26 pm
IP Address: 77.175.23.87
Contact Form URL: https://jefftcann.com/contact/
Sent by a verified WordPress.com user.
Name: Melissa Marks
Email: melissa.marks72@yahoo.com
Website: http://lifeisstrangeblog.com
Comment:
Hi Jeff,
I’ve been reading your blog for nine months now, and I have to say, receiving your posts are the highlight of my week. I feel closer to you than most of the people I know in person. I swear, sometimes I feel like you’re talking directly to me. This may seem a little forward, but I’m going to be passing through Gettysburg on December 28th on my way to Pittsburgh to visit my old college roommate, and I was hoping we could get together for coffee (I know how much you love coffee, “Caffeinated” is my third favorite post LOL). Sure, I think there is always a risk meeting someone you only know online, but in this case, I’m not worried. We’re practically the same person.
Who am I? I’m sure you know my name—lifeisstrangeblog. I “like” every single one of your blog-posts the second you publish them. I don’t even need to read them to know I’m going to love them. I just hit “like” as soon as they show up on my phone. I wish I could “like” them again (you know, “really like” LOL) after I read them, but I can’t. I once sent a suggestion to WordPress asking for the ability to rate “likes” on a scale of 1 – 10. That way, I can tell the bloggers I follow: pretty good, really good or great. But they never wrote me back. Yours would always be a 10 (except for “Field of Screams” that one was just weird).
When we get together, I’d love to give you a copy of my manuscript. It’s a series of short stories all taking place in the ‘20s. My main character is a flapper who spends her nights partying at speakeasies and her days working for the FBI under the guise of a soup kitchen manager feeding the homeless. Each story has its own dilemma and moral, and taken all together, I think it works as historical fiction. I know you’re going to love it. It would mean so much to me if you’d write some praise for the back cover.
One other favor I’d like to ask: I checked into hotel rates in Gettysburg, and for a small town, the hotels there are really expensive. Would it be OK if I spent the night on your couch? I know that we’ll talk for hours, and by the time we’re done, it will be too late to hoof-it the rest of the way to Pittsburgh. Of course, I’d bring a hostess gift for Susan and some sort of treat for Eli and Sophie. I know those three so well, sometimes I feel like they are part of my family LOL. I’d be up and out so early, you wouldn’t even know I was there.
Write me back soon! I need to know if I should do one more edit on my manuscript. I want it to be in it’s best form when you read it. In the meantime, I do hope your holiday prep goes well, and I wish you a Happy “Solstice + 4” (yes, I read your book… twice).
Saying “Love” here might get me in trouble with Susan LOL, so I’ll sign off with:
With great fondness and respect,
Melissa XOXO (Lifesisstrangeblog)
The Other Stuff 
That is too creepy….kinda stalkerish.
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Um, it’s satire. I made it up. Does it seem real?
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Yes it is very real. I was ready to check out her blog post to see how weird this chick was. Well done.
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Well, I made sure the links didn’t go anywhere real. I didn’t check the email address though.
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Too real. I meant to ask why would you post it but then I decided against it.
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I started getting the feeling that everyone thought it was real & that I was an asshole, so I went back and added (satire) to the title. Hopefully everyone will see it.
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Well, it must have been interesting. You succeeded beyond your expectations. You definitely wouldn’t have thought that might cause a problem. The irony.
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I thought I was the only one that had a crush on you?
You’ve been holding back. You sexy blogger you! 😉
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Ha! I thought your crush was dulled by the realization that I”m just an old, suburban dude.
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Lol! Hope you’re well. That was a good one. And yeah… it was quite dulled. Lol! 😅
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Haha. Wait, what’s a “flapper”? **googles flapper** Oh. Well now I’m just sad I didn’t know about them and sad I didn’t put one in my short story that I wrote that takes place in the 20s.
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I know what you mean. Now *I* want to write a story about a flapper who is really an undercover FBI agent.
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Happy that this is satire. When I first read it, my reaction was “Can you say boundary violation”. Its amazing how quickly the accelerating requests, from a reasonable inquiry. “gonna be in your neighborhood, want to have coffee”–in my opinion, I would be free to say yea or nay, end of story. To the over the top requests. Boy do I react there–tells something about me.
Well done! As we joke at my house: Made ya look!
Seems you found something to write about.
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I guess I need to master the nuanced art of satire. We recently had a letter to the editor in our paper where the writer said “A Christmas Carol” was just liberal propaganda. Everyone in town freaked on him. the next day in the paper he swore it was just satire. I should have learned a lesson.
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The response to Jonathan Swift’s A Modest Proposal comes to mind here. Interesting question. That it could be true can be important. Then there’s the Monty Python version of satire. . .
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“There’s a penguin on the telly” is unlikely to be true?
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Depends on where you live, you might check with the ministry of silly walks for the latest on the penguin infestation.
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Very funny! This is why I don’t have a “contact me” button on my site.
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I think you’ve really illustrated my blogging nightmare scenario. I’ve always found horror movies with stalkers the most terrifying.
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What’s scary is that I’ve actually considered initiating a coffee date with some bloggers I know. But then, luckily, the filter kicks in.
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Welcome to being a female gamer on the internet, lol.
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Like everything else creepy, this happens WAY more often to women than men.
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Sadly yup. Men side of it is brushed over more which sucks.
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I’m actually being cyberstalked through my blog right now… By a hateful neighbor angry over a yard project who should have no interest in my life. Fun stuff!
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Not many people I know in real life read my blog, and those who do pretty much keep it to themselves. I always find it awkward when a flesh & blood person comments.
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Well I didn’t plan for him to find it…..but he did.😕
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That sucks. I guess he was doing a bit of cyber-stalking.
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Yeah, I guess I shouldn’t have blogged under my real name (only my first name though), but I had good reasons for that too..
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Hahaha! You got me good and proper Jeff. So funny – and well written.
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When I first posted this, I didn’t identify it as satire. For about six hours people were reading it and not liking it or commenting… silence. When I added “Satire” to the title, people commented that they wondered why I would post something so personal. I need to be careful when writing fiction. No one seems to expect it from me. Thanks for continuing to read. It’s nice to have a friend across the ocean.
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