Last week, I posted a story, Buzz, that paints a picture of drug use. It wasn’t encouraging or cautionary. It offered no opinion. It was simply a snapshot, a vivid scene featuring four intoxicated teens. It went nowhere. Stats-wise, it was my worst performing story in a year. Thirty page-views, two commenters, not so many likes. … Continue reading Buzz, revisited
Blogging
The Other Stuff
#3 - List all aliases: I was asked about aliases recently as I filled out paperwork for my FBI background check. In Pennsylvania, if you plan to work with children, you need to prove—up-front—that you don’t have a propensity to molest them. To facilitate this, your employer needs to review your “Rap Sheet.” The first … Continue reading The Other Stuff
Resolve (a.k.a. shithole)
There was a time not so long ago when appalled by something Donald Trump said I’d attack my laptop spewing venom at the internet and cleanse myself and the rest of the world with the flames of my desire to negate his foul commentary with decency and righteousness. After staking out moral high-ground I held my head high smug … Continue reading Resolve (a.k.a. shithole)
Killing time on New Year’s Eve
I am killing time by blogging, I'm not saying that it's time to kill. Sometimes what I write is crap. This time, I’m blaming Eli. If you don’t frequently read my blog, you won’t know that Eli is my son. He’s twelve. His favorite activities are computer use and destroying shit—usually by fire—but always under … Continue reading Killing time on New Year’s Eve
Ben Huberman
I’m pathetic. No, really, I am. I’m checking my Gmail account twenty-five, thirty times a day. Each time, as I click the link, I repeat my silent mantra. Ben Huberman. Who’s Ben? He’s an editor at WordPress. The guy who sent me an email last July telling me that my blogpost Follow was about to … Continue reading Ben Huberman
Do Not Reply (Satire)
Jeff Cann <donotreply@wordpress.com> Time: December 16, 2017 at 2:26 pm IP Address: 77.175.23.87 Contact Form URL: https://jefftcann.com/contact/ Sent by a verified WordPress.com user. Name: Melissa Marks Email: melissa.marks72@yahoo.com Website: http://lifeisstrangeblog.com Comment: Hi Jeff, I’ve been reading your blog for nine months now, and I have to say, receiving your posts are the highlight of my week. I feel … Continue reading Do Not Reply (Satire)
Facebook my WordPress
I can’t think of single thing to write. This has been going on all week. I sat down the morning after the Alabama Senate election, and I couldn’t get started. I wrote a halfhearted paragraph, and then I packed it in. The rest of the week’s been a blank page. There are things I want … Continue reading Facebook my WordPress
R.E.M.
Stephen King is my favorite author. This is less of a declaration than a confession; he’s not that great a writer. His stories are usually long, unedited monsters that draw in unnecessary subplots, and drone on and on with overly expansive writing. As a master of imaginative stories, he expects no imagination from his readers. … Continue reading R.E.M.
The Memoirist
I’m a memoirist. That’s a clunky word, right? It’s hard to say. It seems like a bastardization of the English language. Constructed for convenience—akin to inventing new verbs like “strategize” or “dialogue.” Could it be a modern word, created to accommodate the billions of bloggers, just like me, who chronical the minutia of their lives? … Continue reading The Memoirist
SEO
If I were you, I wouldn’t even be reading this post. It’s about Search Engine Optimization—a topic that makes my eyes glaze over, makes my mind wander. I’d just move on to the next blogpost appearing in my reader. Blogging is my hobby—a multistage hobby that leaves me satisfied when I complete each part. I … Continue reading SEO
Jenn, Lance & Me
6/20/2015 Jenn Shelton keeps popping up in my life. You might be thinking "Who's Jenn Shelton?" She's a minor celebrity. A world-class ultra-marathon runner and a pretty good writer. She had a bit part in Christopher McDougall's massively bestselling Born to Run. Mostly as comic relief. The book made it seem like when she wasn't … Continue reading Jenn, Lance & Me
Renewal
Every so often, I’ll read a post that’s eerily similar to one I recently published. Too similar. They clearly—I think—stole the idea from me. And I say “Heeeyy, uncool. At least give me a shout-out!” I’m stepping into that realm today, and I don’t want to be accused of plagiarism, idea theft, unoriginality. Yesterday morning, … Continue reading Renewal
Cats (and Dogs)
Since 8:00 on Monday morning, I’ve been job hunting non-stop. Because I’ve only been unemployed and off work for a couple of days, it’s still a habit to keep a To-Do list. I’ve got a big sheet of ledger paper with multiple columns all filled in with the activity areas I want to knock out … Continue reading Cats (and Dogs)
Those things I haven’t done
Two and a half months ago, I started a new job. And then, the pace of my life picked up. Longer hours, more distractions, coming home exhausted, spent. Five weeks ago, my kids went back to school, and my life-pace picked up again. Mornings were shot—the primary focus became getting the kids on the bus. … Continue reading Those things I haven’t done
The cost of blogging
Acer 14" Chromebook, 32GB Flash Memory: $299.00 WordPress Premium upgrade with custom URL: $99.00 100 Vistaprint business cards to publicize book and blog: $16.00 One comment informing me that a post I wrote helped a reader gain understanding and relief from their own personal problems: Priceless via Daily Prompt: Priceless
The Shimmering Image
I’ve taken two writing courses in my life. One class—Creative Nonfiction, I enrolled in it as I first embarked on my writing hobby—was phenomenal. Useful, educational, fun. I walked away with a two-thousand-word essay that makes me proud to this very day. The second class, taken on the heels of the first, gave me nothing. … Continue reading The Shimmering Image
Gratitude
“Don’t let your attitude affect your gratitude!” That’s me talking. “Dad! Shut up! You sound like a stupid kids’ TV show.” This is Eli, he’s eleven. Is he allowed to tell me to shut up? I guess so—when I’m being obnoxious. I’ve been saying the attitude/gratitude thing over and over. I say it like this: … Continue reading Gratitude
Great Expectations
Yes, I know that title’s already been used. ~ ~ ~ ~ “Hundreds of new followers? Isn’t that a good thing?” This was my daughter Sophie. I just told her about having my post featured in WordPress’s Discover. This happened on Sunday morning at 9:00. Seven hours later, Sophie was just getting home. She slept … Continue reading Great Expectations
“Hey, I should warn you, Charlene has googly eyes.” “What does that mean?” They pop way out, like on a frog… or a bug.” “Um, thanks for the warning.” At the start of my career, I worked for a Fortune 500 defense contractor called TRW. One company, 30,000 employees. In an effort to maintain a … Continue reading Google
Red Light
Before Instagram. Before Snapchat. Before Oovoo, Twitter, Pinterest, Facebook, MySpace or email, there was the telephone. In 1986, twenty-three years old, I took a business trip. Two weeks in Denver for training on a workplace population tracking program. I worked for the mega-firm TRW. A government contractor with tens of thousands of employees. So many … Continue reading Red Light
The Other Stuff 